mulletratio.com

i am 22 years old. i work at outback steakhouse in the infamous "villages," where i sell my soul regularly to retired senior citizens in the area for a good tip. i've written enough of these mini life stories to know that the basics, to you, are probably all that matter. nice to meet you.

Friday, May 8, 2009

 

hey here's an idea...

oh life, i wish i could quit you.

i have this theory: don't do drugs. aside from tequila, i've enjoyed every influence i've ever been under, and that is a very scary thought. i don't do/try certain drugs because i'll probably like them. i'm not straight edge or uptight, this is plain and simple. i've never heard anybody say "i tried crack, hated it, not for me."

why can't people chill the eff out, take a [normal] dose of xanax and get over it. why does everyone numb their pain with even more pain? it makes no sense.

it's easy for me to say this considering i've never done anything too crazy, but i stick to what i know.

you might: snort something up your nose.
i might: cry and then blow my nose.

we'll both lose sleep and wake up with puffy eyes, but i'll still have my money and my kisses won't taste like battery acid. if you need me to i'll punch you in the face 'til you cry, because maybe that's all you really need.

i guess i'm bitter. if you have a drug you love, keep it to yourself. i'm so tired of watching people destroy their life (and mine) over a pill or powder. i also really hate that everyone at my job is turning into an addict of some kind.

get OVER IT. it's this new pill, i'll sell it to you for $5. comes with a free kick in the face and a box of tissues.

Comments:
It must seriously be the newest restaurant rage. I don't get it. I really don't.
 
AAAAAGREED!
 
OMG I loved this! and I totally agree

I only do one drug, but I am not proud of it, and I am highly against all drugs
 
I find your new banner odd. Technically, a mullet is a fish. You should be consistent, put some fish up on that tree.
 
lol i don't care for it much either, eric. i'm just gonna play around some more.
 
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