mulletratio.com

oh hai blog. life has been crazy, and that means a lot coming from someone without a working vehicle. i got up at 10am today which is crazy in itself.

tuesday i am going to see tegan and sara in georgia! i'm going to try to keep my cool, like i do at most concerts but i might just end up screaming like a fan girl.

i'm wondering if i can bring my rebel xti aka "reba" with me. if i can't get a solid answer on whether or not cameras are allowed i'll have to leave reba at home. she would be hard to hide in my pants.

so i'm looking at a 6-8 hour drive to georgia with melissa and savina. if melissa can stand putting up with me and savina, listening to tegan and sara and playing car games, for that long i'll have to propose to her. psyyyyyyche.

i'm up early today because i started working out yesterday. all my muscle has turned to fat and multiplied. hopefully i won't get in the ugly cycle of muscle to fat to muscle to even more fat that my older brother was in for a long time.

hi jon! if you're reading this, don't worry, you're totally hot.

it's official. there is a stye in my eye. "it hurts... and it's still hurting." i don't want to go anywhere or really see anyone. the swelling isn't so bad, but it really hurts so all i can think about is my poor eye. and even though i probably look relatively normal, i feel like the hunchback of notre dame.

i just ordered pizza and i don't even want to talk to the pizza guy. i'm thinking about pulling a crazy cat lady move and yelling "leave it on the steps" while slipping money and and maybe some nickels under the door.

up until i was 14 or 15 i had this obsessive compulsive way of eating or chewing. i would split all food or gum in half and chew (what felt like) a perfect half of edible goodness on each side of my mouth.

i always wondered why i did this, but talking to melissa and other close friends has made me realize that it's all because of my grandmother.

when i was 4 she had to force me to eat. you'd never know this by looking at photos with my chubby face and belly. so she told me that there were two little birds in my belly and if i didn't eat, they didn't eat, so i better feed them. and i believed her! i started splitting all my bites in half, thinking that one half would go to one bird and the other half to it's mate. so for 10+ years i had this horrible habbit and didn't know why. i eventually broke the habit when i realized what the hell i was doing, but i didn't realize why exactly until recently.

so thanks, abuela.

i went to sea world with melissa on monday. don't even hate, because deep down you love sea world too. she had never been, and i've haven't had a proper sea world visit since i was a kid.

i saw a lot of cute animals. i always [thought i] loved dolphins before i fed one. at sea world, they are just overfed spoiled brats who beg for fish and jerk their heads away before you can touch them. i think mtv should have an episode of exiled on spoiled dolphins. okay i sound like a peta-cross-burning-dolphin-eating lunatic, so i'm gonna stop. i just wanted to pet one. the sea lions and otters are my favorite now. pb&j otter > flipper.

the killer whales always impress me, because they are so huge and always in sync with the trainers and other whales. actually, i think the trainers impress me more for getting in the water with them and swimming around while the killer whales flip and launch them into the air.

by the end of the day, our 2/4 hours of sleep caught up to us and we took a nap at the closest rest area. it brought back memories of being 10, dirt poor, and packing the whole family in 1 minivan and stopping for the night. except we were in a nice rental and had plenty of room and money and cheesy sea world towels to keep us warm.

when i wasn't hating on the dolphins for not letting us pet them, i was seriously smiling all day like a little kid. love.

tonight i had to train a new girl at outback. i hate training, i really do. i am not a "certified trainer" anyway so i don't know why i would be chosen. the last 4 people i trained all quit or got fired. doesn't anybody notice this? i'm not a bad trainer, i bust my ass at work, and i understand that they need more people that do that, but you can't teach someone basic motor skills and multi-tasking if you have nothing to work with. i'm pretty patient during training, but when it's over i need to vent.

she had unpierced ears, btw. i never noticed how weird that looks. an unpierced ear is like an uncircumcised penis, or any penis really, it's just not right.

as you may or may not have noticed, there are a couple changes here. i bought mulletratio.com through blogger, so mulletratio.blogspot.com now redirects here. it's still a blogger account, though, which i like. when you buy a domain through blogger, you get all these handy google apps to use with your domain... none of which i've even looked at yet. i also changed the layout, once again.

div tables, simple colors and this background make me happy. why? i don't know.

i bought this double cover magazine today. i keep it with the obama side facing up. i didn't even know it had a double cover until i got to the last page of my intense magazine reading and realized the last page was upside down. i was horrified.

why does it all of a sudden seem like it's obama VS palin? i've never voted before (i turned 18 in 2004) because i didn't want to feel like i made the wrong choice. when bush and kerry ran for office i wasn't so sure about kerry, but i knew i didn't want bush. not wanting to regret my vote for kerry, 4 years later, has made me regret not voting against bush.

i'll be voting for obama this year, but the great thing is i'm not just voting against mccain... i'm voting for obama, period. the rest is a bonus. when i imagine mccain being the president, i think of my life when i was 10 and my mother making me watch the 700 club. then the screen goes fuzzy and samara from the ring sucks me in and i'm stuck in a real life 700 club for 4-8 years.

call me cruel, but i have the most brilliant ideas when i first wake up and am too lazy to care about anything. it takes me about an hour to wake up. i think that's how long it takes the feelings in my heart to reach my brain cells.

a little pug showed up at my front door when me and melissa got home the other night. at first i thought it was cute, but it really isn't. it's loud, it sounds like a squealing pig, and it constantly gags on it's extra large pug tongue. today, we were going to post flyers before i accidentally had this idea.

two houses down from us lives this couple with like 5 dogs. the dogs try to jump the fence when i let melissa's dog out in the morning. they have a couple small dogs, too, so i figured i would see if she belonged to them in the most indirect way possible. if she didn't belong to them, i at least figured they wouldn't send her away since they clearly can't say no to dogs.

so once upon a time little pug wondered over to neighbor's house. the dogs living there freaked out, and just as i assumed, the owners came out. a couple minutes later i walked around the corner and saw a lady holding her, smiling ear to ear. i yelled "not my pig dog, is she yours?" she shook her head no. "i don't know" i said and she laughed. i smiled for other reasons and went inside to start a new day without the pug.

i love the feeling of moths free falling into my lap when i'm trying to write. for a couple days i couldn't sit on my porch with my laptop, like i normally love to do, because of all the bugs and mosquitoes. then, one saturday morning, melissa bought this amazing fog that kills every flying hellion on sight, and possibly small pets.

right now it's just me and the frog. there was a frog (or maybe a toad) in the yard a couple weeks ago and melissa's dog tasted it a little, sending it into shock. earlier that night i had eaten crab legs. long story short: i ended up with a giant bump on my lip. everyone says i'm allergic to shellfish, but in the back of my mind i kinda think it was from the dog licking my face after the "froad" because i've had shellfish before.

i don't know what's worse: developing even more allergies, or frog/toad germs infecting my lip.

i changed my layout. i love blogger. it reminds me of greymatter. and if you know what i'm talking about, we should be bffs fo eva. this layout reminds me of the good old days when i was 16. writing about absolutely nothing and setting up layouts the easiest way possible.

i'm sitting outside of panera bread with savina in the villages (huge retirement community) killing time before work. this place gives me the creeps. one time i came in during the dinner rush with my laptop to use the internet and every old bastard in the place stopped what they were doing and stared at me. it was like a bad dream where you're on stage trying to picture everyone naked because of how uncomfortable you are, except worse. they (ALL) watched me walk to the bathroom, order my food, and sit down.